The End of a Chapter - Part One

This Christmas was such a bittersweet one for our family. For my immediate family, it was the first, and hopefully only time, Dad was not with us for Christmas. We are so proud that he is serving his country, but we selfishly wanted him home with us. Because Dad was gone, the kids and I went to Nana's house in Florida for Christmas. We all had a WONDERFUL time with her and so many others in our family, but is was still bittersweet to not be in our home for Christmas. These are just a few of the reasons that this Christmas was a good one for our family, but also filled with sadness.

The biggest reason for our bittersweet Christmas is that this was the first Christmas without my grandmother, Marguerite Simpson. My grandfather, J. T. Simpson passed away in July 2006 and she joined him in July 2009. I have so many fond memories of celebrating holidays in their home. We may not have always been together on Christmas, but we tried to be at Grandmother and Granddaddy's sometime during the Christmas season. My grandmother didn't "put on airs" with fancy decorations, centerpieces or fine china. Our family meals together were served buffet-style on Chinet plates with red solo cups (to be washed and saved - not thrown away) for beverages, sweet tea for most. Once our plates were filled, there was jockeying for who would get to sit at what table (and the past few years, who would sit by Nana, but that is another post). Being at these family gatherings were so special and I don't think I could even count the number of meals eaten at this house. During these times together, we laughed at old stories, re-connected with cousins, aunt, uncles, brother and sisters that we didn't see often. But mostly, these gatherings were about being a Simpson. Once you entered this house, it didn't matter what was going on in your life, what you had done or hadn't done, your troubles were checked at the door. And trust me, there were many troubles checked at the door. And as I look back on those times, and as I grow as a parent, I believe that my grandparents were the happiest when their home was full of their children, in-laws, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Okay, so maybe they were the HAPPIEST when we all were gone and they were left with the quiet of the day just to be together and reminisce about the time with their family. Anyone who knew them, knew how much they loved all of us, but most of all, we knew how much they loved each other!

I had a hard time coming up with a name for this post. Originally, as I left Reform this year a few days before Christmas, I thought to myself, "this is the end of an era". And that was my first thought for this post title, but that sounds so final. Yes, my wonderful grandparents are gone, I'll never see this again this side of heaven and there are days that thought can almost paralyze me. In fact, if it weren't for the Navy and 3 little ones in the house, I think it would paralyze me, but as a Simpson, I learned to persevere no matter what was going on and so when the sadness almost overcomes me, I think of my husband and his huge sacrifice for our family or one of my little ones who needs me and I keep on going. It is also sad that there won't be the same connection with cousins, aunts and uncles. These people have all helped shape me into who I am and I am grateful to be a part of such a rich family. Yes, we all have had our share of heartache and some of us have made bad decisions along the way, but we were never forsaken at least not by a Simpson. I like to think of my life as a novel and each chapter adds to what will be read in the final chapter. So, the passing of my grandparents and the end of big family get-togethers is but an end of a chapter in my life, and the lives of so many others. It is a sad chapter, but one that has to be written in all of our lives.